Monday, July 11, 2011

Pregnant on the Internet

During my first pregnancy I had little to no access to the internet and was stuck reading What to Expect... over and over again while waiting for any and all magazines even remotely related to the miracle of birth to hit the newstands.  During my second pregnancy I had a huge stack of magazines and one very well thumbed copy of What to Expect... to peruse, but this time around I have 24 hour access to the internet!  And what a curse it has turned out to be!  My God the things that can go wrong!  Like this:
Overalls and pregnancy do not mix ladies.  They just don't.  I'd rather see you chugging back a couple of brewskies then sporting a ginormous pair of overalls during these precious days.
Or this can happen:
Is it Halloween?  Is that your costume?  Are you a real bonafide witch?  I always assumed that 'real' witches don't actually wear the hats.  Maybe I'm wrong?  I know it's really hard to dress like yourself when your expecting(has anyone seen me in the past few trimesters?), so maybe she was just trying to accessorize? 
I'm so glad it's finally Summer so I can find other naked pregnant ladies to hang out with.  This sort of thing is just plain embarrassing when you're by yourself.
What can I say?  There are so many pics out there like this one.  Too many really.

Here's another one.
And another one.  
And there are other things to be frightened of as well.  Like what if you get pregnant BEFORE you are married?  Yeah, what if?  Don't worry.  Internet to the rescue!

This poor lady.  I almost felt so bad for her that I wasn't going to post this picture, but it's from fugly.com so I think it's been viewed a few times already.  But at least she wore a dress. 
I realize you want to be comfy when your expecting, but sweat pants and a sports bra, really?  Nice veil though.

I don't think this would be acceptable if she wasn't expecting.  Actually I still don't think it's acceptable. 

And all I can say about this pic is that I'm pretty sure there's a reason her head is cropped out of the photo... I'm guessing the entire set up was his idea.

Having been through a few pregnancies now I can admit that I've gone through the whole gamut of reactions when you do the home pregnancy test.  Disbelief, tears(these can be happy, or sad, or a mix of both), the desire to call everyone you know, the desire to pee on many many more tests just to confirm what test #1 says, but one thing I have never done is this:
" Hmmm...two lines that means I'm pregnant!  wow!  I better smell this sucker just to be sure."

1 comment:

  1. Hello, I found this post on accident. Funny post I've read on the internet in a long time. Thanks for the laughs! LOL...

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